The Hodma'dod: Rebellious crew, a tranquil river and being cured of punning

In my last post I mentioned that neither Teazle nor Tansy were keen to go on the island. Well they rebelled totally and said that they were not stepping off the boat to visit this p******g sized island and if we thought they were going to do what they should do on it then we had another think coming. They would hold everything until they got back to the mainland. So it was, that early Sunday morning, we unhitched ourselves from the islet and sailed the 50 yards or so across to the river bank and moored exactly opposite the spot we had on the island. They were very relieved in more ways than one!

So we spent the day there, a rather cloudy one but I walked them up to Clivedon House only to find that dogs were not permitted into the grounds but it was a grand walk through the woods anyway.

Monday dawned very dank and dreary and shortly after we had started it began to rain. The plan was to go into Maidenhead and find the laundrette that was listed in the guide book to do the washing. We moored on some free 24hour moorings and I volunteered to walk into town with the girls to locate said launderette before Sarah trundled Miss Biddy (Miss Biddy is the wheeled shopping basket we have on board. It is extremely handy and takes huge amounts of stuff, be it food from the supermarket or laundry to the launderette but it absolutely destroys my street cred - assuming I have any in the first place - as its one of those square ones on four wheels that you see all the old Biddy’s (hence her name) staggering around the town with. If we are taking it shopping I usually walk a few paces behind Sarah to try to avoid being associated with it but I found myself having to wheel it through one town and decided the only way I could do it and not feel a total wally was to power walk the whole way - anyway I digress)… before Sarah trundled Miss Biddy full of washing to said establishment. After about a 20 minute walk I located said premises to find that they no longer offered a launderette service so back to the boat to press on. However by then the rain was coming down in buckets so we travelled only a half mile or less and decided to call it a day and moor up still in Maidenhead.

Tuesday saw us going down through Windsor (you can tell its a tourist trap - dingy hire was £25 for half an hour!) and we moored at Runnymead having stocked up with fuel off a travelling barge at a lot better price that the marinas were quoting.

We visited the Magna Carta memorial which was erected by the American Bar Association and the JFK memorial which is on an acre of land we gave the Americans. Seems they take more interest in Magna Carta than we do!

The following morning did not start as planned. As is our usual practice I got up at about 6.00 to let the dogs out and make a cup of tea. The girls have been exemplary in their behaviour in the mornings and I’m not really awake so perhaps not as switched on as they are but they didn’t miss this cat that was skulking down the towpath. Off like two cruise missiles up the towpath past the boat moored next to us, quick detour on to their stern deck as the cat tried to find an escape route, back on the towpath hurtling past me into the distance disappearing around a corner towards the boatyard which had huge piles of bits and pieces everywhere. So I stormed after them. Picture the scene with me in my PJ’s, dressing gown and derry boots - sexy hey? - running down the towpath hissing their names so as to try not to wake up all the boaters. I got to the boatyard and not a sign of them. Hell, if they have chased the cat into those piles of rubbish - sorry those carefully stored items of historical interest - it could take weeks to dig them out. I decided that I would have to return to the boat get Sarah up and get dressed and hope for the best. Cursing and muttering about B****y terriers I came round the corner to the boat to see a border terrier standing at the side of our boat, surprisingly, it was Teasle as she's usually the one I’m extracting from thorn bushes- “Hi Dad, did you see us chase that cat - hey that was great fun, super way to start the day, What, you not happy? Why’s that? Oh, No Tansy’s here too, she’s already on board recovering from the exertion”

Mmmm. I did eventually calm down.

And so onto the River Wey. If there was a place that will cure you of wanting to make puns this is it. It is tempting of course but after having seen what seems like dozens of boats called “The only Wey is up” or “This Wey up” or “Hem-in-Wey” or “Wey Hey” or… oh well you get the idea; I’m not going to enter the contest.

The Wey itself is a delight. After the hurley burley of the Thames it is a backwater to savour the slow pace on board. We came on to it on Thursday and moored the first night near West Byfleet which was very quiet except for the continual hum of M25 traffic so moved on to Send and a truly idyllic spot, very quiet and peaceful. Saturday saw us up early and away by 7.15 and what beautiful morning to be up and about on. A really peaceful journey as we progressed through Guildford and on towards Godalming when we had a complete change of tempo and found ourselves in the middle of everyone and his granny out in rowing boats, punts and day launches, most, obviously, never having been in any sort of boat before. It started to go downhill when we had a narrowboat trying to get into the lock before we had exited it and they ended up totally across the river having been dragged by the weir and wind; we then had a hen party in a day launch broadside on just the other side of a bridge hole with the helmswoman having no idea which way to turn the tiller to straighten things up; I did shout to tell her but I don't think she even knew what a tiller was; we had a sculler who had yet to grasp which oar to pull on to make the boat go a particular way so ended up under our bows, we had rowing boats that as soon as they saw us bolted for the tree line (probably sensible because by that time I was thinking how many skull and crossbones I could draw on the side of the boat to mark the number of enemy sinkings)

Anyway we made Goldalming and whilst Sarah went to Sainburys (the moorings are right outside) I tried to fill up with water to find the tap had been removed so settled just for emptying the cassette toilet. So a short trip then to start our return journey to moor up near the junction of the defunct Wey and Arun canal and then today on to a different mooring at Send. Again absolute bliss, I’m typing this sitting on the back deck in gorgeous evening sunshine with total silence around me apart from a few boisterous ducks.

We have a couple more days on the this river so will slowly make our wey back to the Thames - Opps sorry couldn’t resist it.